This entry was posted on Thursday, December 6th, 2007 at 10:45 PM and is filed under Life. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
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Have you ever done something that you regret? Have you ever avoided doing something that you regret? Do you ever wish you would have told someone something that could have changed your life totally for the better but didn’t? Do you regret it? Have you walked away from something special in your life for fear of being hurt and then regretted it? Have you felt the pressure was too strong in a certain situation for you to stick around so you left the situation completely and now regret it?
I have made many mistakes in my life and, the bad thing is, I can’t go back and repair the damage I have done. I can only live with regrets. I have hurt many people in my life and can’t seem to get to the point where I can attempt to right my wrongs. Even if I could right my wrongs, I don’t think that the person would let me back into their life. It’s like forgiveness can be granted, but things can never be the same between the two. I’ve caused so much hurt to some people that they can’t even look at me. Won’t even look at me. Refuse to think about the good times we shared. The pain I have caused is not something I can take back and I don’t deserve even a chance to make things right or to prove that I can be everything and more that I once was.
The emptiness you feel when you live with regrets is unreal. Knowing that you have not only hurt yourself immensely, but that you have caused someone you care about so much pain, the same amount of pain, if not more than you feel, hurts deeply. How do you go back? Can you go back? If you can’t go back and make things better or mend the relationship, how do you move on? How do you not only deal with the hurt you feel, but the fact that you can never once again be engaged with this person in a way that is meaningful to both of you?
How do you live with the hurt when you know what you walked away from seemed so perfect, like nothing you had ever felt before? How can you ever make it up to the person, or should we say the victim? Especially when they have walls built up so tall to resist you that even God has troubles seeing over them. They are protecting themselves so tightly that you don’t see even an inch of weakness that you could rush through, grab them, let them feel your embrace to just even show them that you are truly sorry and would love for another chance to make things right. Just a chance.
Am I the only man, person, other out there that has huge regrets in my life? Am I the only one who has hurt someone you care deeply about and can’t make it right between that person or even attempt to renew and pursue that relationship again?
To those I have hurt, I am sorry… Please forgive me… I would love the opportunity to make things right. I would love the opportunity to move forward or pick up from where we left off. I just want back what I have lost… yet, I know I don’t deserve it.
I write this for the world to see… I am a broken man…
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Until next time…
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4 Responses to “Do You Have Regrets?!”
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December 7th, 2007 at 9:12 PM
*Hugs*
FromDecember 9th, 2007 at 2:01 AM
dude, i completely understand this feeling. it sucks not being able to take back everything you ever said or did. it seems like with all the technology, we have in our society, we would have built a way to rewind things for just a bit to fix those wrongs. i hate that you’re feeling this way, man. you’ve always been like a brother to me. i wish i could say it will all be better soon, but it might not be, but don’t fret. cause i have had the chance to go back and right some wrongs, and although those relationship that i broke or damaged may not ever be the same, closure can be beneficial in helping you both heal, whoever the relationship was with. closure is a much needed commodity that very few seem to posess anymore, but when it comes, you will both feel refreshed and whole.
man, i hope that didn’t come out to mushy or philosophical, but i meant it. dude, you’re a great guy and i pray for the best for your life.
jason
FromDecember 9th, 2007 at 2:02 AM
See my very similar rant on the very same subject:
http://www.hardbop200.com/2007/10/02/1831/
Unfortunately, my take on the subject is pretty grim…regrets are a horrible thing. There’s nothing you can do to fix them.
That’s why forgiveness is such a beautiful thing.
FromDecember 10th, 2007 at 10:56 PM
Regrets. I know exactly how you feel…
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